"Chairman Kaga" (mike-mckinnon) 03/22/2016 at 12:36 • Filed to: None

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I posted this yesterday to McParland’s “don’t buy a new car to save money” post, and based on the response thought I’d send it up here too.

Stop buying new cars to make yourself feel awesome.

I’m going to share what is going to likely be an incredibly unpopular perspective - I hate my daily driver but I’m actually OK with that. Here’s my shitty car manifesto.

“But Mike, you should enjoy your time behind the wheel. It’s liberation. It’s expressing yourself. It should represent who you are as a human.”

Bullshit. Every morning I get into my 2008 Honda CR-V LX with its front wheel drive and automatic 5-speed transmission and insipid glacier blue paint, and I drive my two daughters to preschool. It takes about 10 minutes and we usually listen to a Star Wars soundtrack on a pretty decent stereo that I pieced together with the help of some extremely competent folks at Crutchfield. I kiss them goodbye.

Then I enter the pit. For the next 52 minutes to a full hour, I drive 6.2 miles to my office in urban gridlock that literally gets worse every single day.

My commute is, without a doubt, the worst part of my day, every day. There is nothing about this drive that would be made more enjoyable if I were behind the wheel of a Focus RS. It fact, it would be worse because I’d not only be shifting 5,000 times but also fighting an urge to let loose. Which would, of course, be impossible. I’d then wrestle every morning with the frustration of owning a relatively expensive performance car but being totally unable to enjoy it. Why did I spend almost $40,000 on a car that I can only use in the most basic way intended?

The drive home is actually worse with regard to traffic density. The last mile to my house is usually relatively clear, although it’s in a neighborhood with a 25 MPH speed limit.

The Honda CR-V is in essence everything I loathe about cars. It’s bigger than I need, it’s slow, it’s not especially fuel efficient, it’s irrationally uncomfortable, and it’s irredeemably dull in every objective measure. I truly hate it as much as any car I’ve ever driven, and I’ve driven some shit cars.

However... It’s paid for. It’s reliable. I don’t give a shit about it. What I mean is I tend to its maintenance and ensure it remains safe and viable transportation, but if it gets dented or a buzzard shits on it or the rear sprayer nozzle falls off, it doesn’t make me panic. I do like the stereo. The AC blows cold. I do wish I could install the front seats from a Merc S-Class, and maybe I will if I can figure out how. But otherwise, it is what it is. Basic transportation for me and my family. Every time I think about getting a new car I end up with a stomach ache thinking about not only the years of monthly payments and increased insurance premiums, but also the frustration of not being able to enjoy the thing while remaining anxious about what might happen to it in this ridiculous city. I also ponder, and nearly did, trade for something of relatively equal value, but that reliability wild card scares me, honestly. My CR-V is a known quantity. I’m relatively sure with only 60,000 miles now that I can drive it for at least 10 more years.

So screw it. I’m keeping the hateful CR-V until it literally stops working, and even then I might just swap in a new engine or transmission or whatever major component stops it from moving and keep on truckin’. I’m just done wanting a new badass car to try and make me feel alive and 20 years old. Instead of that new car we’re planning a month in Europe for the summer of 2018, new kitchen cabinets next year, and maybe adding a few investments to the portfolio now. Yes, you can save that much when you don’t buy a $40,000 car every 4 years.

And to maintain my Jalop cred, I’d like to inform everyone the Alfa is back on the road and enjoyed a breathless blast through the Texas hill country this past weekend. It drank 3/4 of a tank of gas (and a bit of Seafoam) and absolutely massacred some low-speed hairpins. It was the most exciting 2 hours of my life in recent memory. Would I get home without a flatbed? Would I need the fire extinguisher? Getting my heel/toe back up to snuff is going to be fun.

So instead of buying new cars to make yourself feel awesome, buy an old car. Fix it up. Make it yours. Drive it hard, break it, then fix it again. God bless fun cars and an empty, gnarly road.

!!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!!

For Sweden > Chairman Kaga 03/22/2016 at 12:42

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But glacier blue paint you’re living the dream

Chariotoflove > Chairman Kaga 03/22/2016 at 12:44

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What you describe is, I believe, how most drivers feel about driving, minus the frustration and longing for a chance to cut loose. Most drivers don’t care about that stuff.

Funktheduck > Chairman Kaga 03/22/2016 at 12:47

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Basically how I felt about my Corolla. Do something about those seats. The ones in the Corolla weren't great to start with but while spending hours a day in it as the years and mileage climbed, my back was starting to act up. Either get different seats to swap out or add stuff to them. Your back and butt will thank you as the years go on

Chairman Kaga > Chariotoflove 03/22/2016 at 12:55

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So I sat through MANY panels on the future of autonomous transportation at SXSW last week, and I have to say - I’m sold. Aside from deadlines and work and the escalating crisis of raising responsible, wordly children in an increasingly chaotic, narcissistic and anti-intellectual society, drivin in traffic is my greatest stressor. Folks literally do not know how to operate a motor vehicle and we are doing nothing to change that. So the solution is simple, relatively speaking. Technology will remove the act of driving from our daily routines. If the model pans out, transportation won’t even be privately owned, but a service provided either by local or state government, just like roads, or by provate companies. You summon a car, you get in, you go where you want to go, you get out, the car leaves. And so on. Within 100 years all transportation will function within this basic model. No one will own cars. No one will drive. On one hand I hate it (I’m on Jalopnik after all), but on the other, we’ll get by. Society will evolve and we’ll find something else to become obsessed with. So it goes, man.

Stef Schrader > Chairman Kaga 03/22/2016 at 12:59

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Preach.

I like a fun car for when I can open it up on backroads, but commuting will be hell regardless.

Chariotoflove > Chairman Kaga 03/22/2016 at 13:03

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I think in urban centers where this could replace gridlock, it could add years to everybody’s lives and even reverse their gray hairs. Where gridlock and congestion is not a concern, the equation still swings back toward freedom of movement. But for a daily commute like you have, yeah I’d be a total convert too.

BeaterGT > Chairman Kaga 03/22/2016 at 13:09

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Yeaaaah, there’s no way I could do that. I moved instead.

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > Chairman Kaga 03/22/2016 at 13:10

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But in order for you to enjoy that fun old car, somebody had to have bought it new.

yamahog > Chairman Kaga 03/22/2016 at 13:11

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Meh, I’d been driving pieces of shit all my life and treated myself to a brand-new, custom-ordered, gonna-depreciate-like-hell fun car last year. Not the best financial decision, but fuck it, I’ve been a broke ass tightwad most of my life doing boring things like living in basements and squirreling away half of every paycheck knowing I’d have to live the whole school year off summer internship money and I now have the means to live a little.

No way I’d be dropping $40k every four years though. I agree with you on that.

Chairman Kaga > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 03/22/2016 at 13:13

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Sure. Of course. Let them take the hit, and you reap the reward. If you’re lucky they got really upside down and will be desperate to unload it.

Wheelerguy > For Sweden 03/22/2016 at 13:14

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Huh. I do like that color. Bland enough to blend in, but is quite remarkable.

Wonder if it will wear well in a Singer Porsche...

gin-san - shitpost specialist > Chairman Kaga 03/22/2016 at 13:16

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I agree with what you’re saying. I drive an econobox and there’s only so much fun you can have with it, but it’s reliable. It’s a 2009 model year but only recently crossed the 50,000km mark; as much as I would like a new car, it’s a ridiculous thing to do financially at this point in my life, and my current car has been very reliable. The odd small fix is much more palatable than eating a multi-hundred dollar payment every month.

The thing is, I love cars. I enjoy driving, but the greatest adversary to being a model Jalop is real life. There's definitely a few other things I need to sort out and stabilize before spending money on a brand new ride.

E92M3 > Chairman Kaga 03/22/2016 at 13:20

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This is just depressing....but it’s true.

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > Chairman Kaga 03/22/2016 at 13:24

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So your entire car buying philosophy is to prey on unfortunate people?

BJ > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 03/22/2016 at 13:43

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Who said that new car buyers are unfortunate? And Chairman Kaga doesn’t sound like a predator to me...

I think the philosophy is to benefit from the differences in philosophy. Some people put priority on having a new car that’s cool, or has a warranty, or has better gadgets, or is new simply because new is better.

They are MOST welcome to spend their money that way. The Chairman - and many like him - will simply wait patiently for their scraps and benefit from the depreciation that the previous owner was willing to eat.

shop-teacher > Chairman Kaga 03/22/2016 at 14:00

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I’m with you, except for the uncomfortable part. Why not get something cheap and reliable that you don’t give a shit about, that’s also comfortable? Or don’t, but that would be my move personally.

davesaddiction @ opposite-lock.com > Chairman Kaga 03/22/2016 at 14:06

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I’m sold, so long as our freedoms are not taken from us in the process...

http://www.rightfootdown.com/thoughts/the-f…

davesaddiction @ opposite-lock.com > BeaterGT 03/22/2016 at 14:10

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If my work situation included two hours of hell every weekday, yeah, something would have to change...

davesaddiction @ opposite-lock.com > Chairman Kaga 03/22/2016 at 14:17

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For three years, I dealt with a 45 minute commute each way with zero traffic, and I could hardly handle it. I can’t imagine dealing with the 2 hours of hell every day that you have to. I’m very thankful that I can actually somewhat enjoy my drive to and from work in the $40k used car I bought 4 years ago. I do often wish there way a longer, prettier, curvier way in, though...

Austin is a great city, but is it really worth 10+ hours of hell every week? My brother lives on the west side, and his office is pretty close to his home. My parents recently sold their home of 35 years in Missouri and moved down there to an apartment where they can walk to the grocery, movies & other shops. Thankfully they can generally avoid the gridlock.

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > BJ 03/22/2016 at 14:33

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He just told me I should be buying from desperate people who are in over their head. If that’s not predation, I don’t know what is.

Chairman Kaga > shop-teacher 03/22/2016 at 15:02

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Oh, I’d prefer something comfortable. I came really close to selling the CRV and getting an ‘08 Acura TL, but as I mentioned the reliability wild card ended up dissuading me. And I only have the CRV because of a wife panicking over not hacving enough room with a second kid on the way (I had a Fit previously). The car was my mother in law’s, who’d had it since new and just towed it behind her RV, which is why it only had 30k miles when I got it. So it was a good deal, although DEFINITELY not the car I would have chosen if I’d been given the opportunity.

shop-teacher > Chairman Kaga 03/22/2016 at 15:04

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Fair enough.

Chairman Kaga > davesaddiction @ opposite-lock.com 03/22/2016 at 15:09

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It’s on the table but I’m not actively looking for work in other markets. And I don’t even know where we’d go. I envy my friends in Chapel Hill who walk to and from work every day, or my friends in London who take the tube, or my friends who work from home.

There’s no public transportation to speak of here. Every week there’s soemething like 100 more cars on our roads. Every infrastgructure improvement plan is literally a decade behind the growth curve and there’s no money to fund them, anyway.

I would LOVE to move, other than the fact Austin is a great city to raise kids simply because of the amazing cultural opportunities. Although if the city is so jammed with people that you literally can’t go to enjoy them...

I dunno. I know I hate driving now, that it completely stresses me out and I’m sure it’s negatively affecting my health. Considering getting a eBike motor for my Marin and hoofing it, once this trail system opens next year. It goes from my neighborhood all the way to Zilker Park, which is only a few miles from the office on some pretty easy roads.

davesaddiction @ opposite-lock.com > Chairman Kaga 03/22/2016 at 16:32

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Hopefully the bike thing works out for you, and that more and more companies in big, congested cities get on board with their acceptance of employees working from home.

Chairman Kaga > davesaddiction @ opposite-lock.com 03/22/2016 at 17:27

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As long as I’m in the public sector it’ll never happen.Public sentiment polls indicate taxpayers demand public employees are at their desks from 8 until 5. In fact, our governor vetoed a bill encouraging state offices to offer flexible work hours and work from home options.

https://legiscan.com/TX/bill/SB1032…

davesaddiction @ opposite-lock.com > Chairman Kaga 03/22/2016 at 18:09

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Lame. As long as you’re getting your work done, who the hell cares?

BJ > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 03/22/2016 at 18:10

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I was going to start an argument on semantics, but then that won’t get either of us anywhere, will it?

You have a valid point, I have a point. Have a good day! :)